Second timers now account for one in four weddings. Age brings wisdom and experience and re-marrying means having the wedding that you, not your mum, dreamed of.  A second wedding can be the day of your dreams if you keep a few vital points in mind.

Whether widowed or divorced, no matter how happy people are for you, it is likely that your wedding will bring mixed emotions to some. This needs careful handling.

Firstly – your ex. Even if you are not on friendly terms, it is always best to tell an ex-partner directly, especially if there are children involved. If you can’t face telling them in person, write a letter and if you want to invite them, make sure you inform guests beforehand so no one feels uncomfortable.

The in-laws – oh-oh, this can be tricky. Grandparents may worry that your re-marriage will deprive them of a relationship with their grandchildren – be clear and concise, reassure them that they are, and will remain, an important part of your children’s lives. If you invite them to the service, don’t be upset if they refuse – they may wish you happiness but still find it painful to see you move on.

Children – oh dear! Again, sensitivity is required. Make it clear that this is your day but at the same time include them in some of the decisions so that they feel a real part of it.

Dress sense – there is no reason why you should not dress however you please – if you want to wear white do so, but remember that your figure will have changed and that frou frou meringue may not be the most forgiving option !

Your partner – this may be the second wedding for you, and the first for him, or vice versa. You may have missed out on a white wedding the first time, whereas he may have done it all before and want a simple ceremony. As with any wedding, remember that compromise is important to the marriage as a whole – communicate openly beforehand and reach your decisions based on mutual trust and understanding and you will have a happy and memorable day and form the basis for a strong future together.